


LSD: The Mad Tea Party

by Lamia of the Dark (VisceraNight)



Category: Death Note, Pet Shop of Horrors
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-03-01 06:17:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2762756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VisceraNight/pseuds/Lamia%20of%20the%20Dark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when L and D meet? A tea party, of course! I've thrown in Leon and Light for good measure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	LSD: The Mad Tea Party

~ LSD: The Mad Tea Party ~

Leon Orcot, frustrated in his attempts to connect Count D with the "pet shop murders" (as he liked to call it), has now enlisted the aid of L in his search.

It's been several weeks since he contacted L, and he hasn't heard from the investigator since. Leon decided it was time he made a visit to the pet shop himself.

When Leon arrived, he saw that the Count already had company today...

There were two men sitting on D's sofa. One was a bored young man, clearly trying to ignore the fact that he was handcuffed to his companion by a three-foot chain. The other man had his shoes off and was perched like a crouching gargoyle on the edge of his seat.

"Hello, detective. I'm L," the stranger greeted him, barely glancing at Leon as he dropped a handful of sugar cubes into his tea.

"You're L?!" Leon repeated in shock.  _This weirdo is the legendary detective...?_  he thought to himself.

"Yes," L replied, picking up a tea-soaked sugar cube from the mountain in his cup and dropping it into his mouth. "The contracts clearly state that if any of the rules are broken, the shop can't be held responsible. They are all legal documents and in none of the cases were the rules followed. Therefore, the shop and Count D are not responsible in any way..."

"But," Leon protested, "He sells dangerous animals-!"

"Even a dog or cat can be dangerous if not treated properly," L replied, graciously accepting a piece of lusciously layered chocolate-vanilla-raspberry cream cake from the Count.

"He sells illegal animals!" Leon was starting to sound desperate now.

"Did you know that pythons and even tigers are legal as pets?" L asked, sounding bored. He was obviously much more interested in the cake. "There are some animals that can't be owned without a permit, but there aren't many animals that are actually illegal to own."

"What about... the Kirin?" Leon was beyond desperate to bring THAT up.

"Detective, the Kirin is a creature of legend. If some idiot insists on buying one, despite the fact that one cannot be given, that is well within their rights as Americans."

"OK, fine, I give up. You win, Count," Leon said in a defeated tone. He sank into an armchair and took the cup of tea the Count offered him. Since L was adding so much sugar, Leon assumed that the count had not sweetened the tea very much... Once he took a sip, he realized his mistake. "UGH! Count, how much sugar did you put in here?!" He glanced over at L, who was adding more sugar cubes to his cup now. "That guy must have one hell of a sweet tooth if he's adding that much sugar to YOUR tea."

Light spoke up for the first time, "All of L's teeth are sweet teeth."

~end~


End file.
